Footprints

But the Lord stood with me and gave me strength. 

- 2 Timothy 4:17

I have a confession. One that I'm sure most of us have experienced while on our walk with Christ. Maybe even what brought you to Christ. I've fallen back into this trap.

I've been trying to do everything on my own.

Who hasn't tried this or believed that they could? Recently, this has been a real struggle for me. Especially with grades. I think, if I just study a little more or if I meet with the teacher one more time, then maybe I can make the grades I want. Not even the grades I need, but the ones I want. 

And what have I found? 

I can't do it all alone.

I need God by my side. I have been stressing and eating and worrying and crying and pacing and studying and venting about school and the future. Yet, I've gotten nowhere because I should be praying about it as much as I've been talking about it. That is where real strides are taken. When I pray about my burdens, I get this uncomparable peace in my heart that everything will be alright. 

Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.

- 1 Peter 5:7

Why do I not do this? I think it comes from a seed of pride and of fear. I take pride in the fact that I can balance a hectic life between school and grades and friends and a sorority and extra cirriculars. But when it all becomes too much, as it ultimately does, I don't want to admit that I can't do it. So many others can relate to this too. Whether you're a mother who wants to prove that she is "Super Mom" or a father who wants to be there for his children while also being successful at work. Whether you're a teenage girl who is dealing with issues she didn't know existed a few years ago or a guy who simply feels like he doesn't fit in. No one can do life alone. 

If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then I will hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land. 

- 2 Chronicles 7:14

The key to fixing this problem is right there. We must humble ourselves before the Lord. We have to admit that we need Him. That is a lesson that I have learned over and over again. And have continuously come to the Lord with. "God, I've done it again. I've tried to do it on my own." I know that I am a college student now, so I fully expect to face this problem again. But hopefully, the next time, I have learned to recognize it sooner. That I might turn and repent for losing faith.

When we turn to do things on our own, we are telling God that we don't believe that His plan is good enough. That we don't trust Him to lead us in the best way possible. Our hearts are not tuned in to His gentle guidance. But God's plan is always in our best interest. Romans 8:28. He always works for our good if we have been called to His service. Why do I question it? Why do we all doubt? Because faith is hard sometimes. That's the truth of it. But praying to God about any concern will always, always lighten our load.

The second major reason that I try to do it alone is because of fear. Fear of the future. Fear of the unknown. Fear of anything, honestly. The future is something that I know nothing about, its full of wishes and dreams, but, ultimately, I have no control of it. And neither do you. Honestly, that can be very scary. 

Especially, if we are not constantly in communication with God. If we are not leaning on Him and asking Him for guidance, reassurance, hope, that His will be done. My instinct tells me that if I try to control every ounce of my life, that is my best shot at controlling my future. Right now, I am in the midst of applying to medical school. So it seems like every grade, activity, or choice I make affects the outcome of acceptance. I've seen friends do wonderfully and then seen others face difficulties. And that scares me. So does the MCAT, which is what I should be studying for right now. But hey, I'm handing it over to God. 

If I do my best, He will do the rest.

If I had a life motto, that would be it. All God can ask of us is our best. He knows what that is for each of us individually. So, I will study and practice and, most importantly, pray. Because God's plan will unfold for me. Just as it will for you. 

...Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? ...Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

- Matthew 6:25-34

Don't let pride and fear have a hold in your life. Don't walk the path alone. First off, you don't want to. Second off, you don't have to. God is there by your side every step of the way. The Lord will stand by you and give you strength even when  you think you can't go on. 

In honor of Mother's Day this Sunday, I want to post one of my mama's favorite poems that I believe fits perfectly. Sometimes we don't even have to walk. Have a blessed week.

One night I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord.

Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.

In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand.

Sometimes there were two sets of footprints,

other times there were one set of footprints.

This bothered me because I noticed

that during the low periods of my life,

when I was suffering from

anguish, sorrow or defeat,

I could see only one set of footprints.

So I said to the Lord,

"You promised me Lord,

that if I followed you,

you would walk with me always.

But I have noticed that during

the most trying periods of my life

there have only been one

set of footprints in the sand.

Why, when I needed you most,

you have not been there for me?"

The Lord replied,

"The times when you have

seen only one set of footprints,

is when I carried you."

Mary Stevenson