Footprints

But the Lord stood with me and gave me strength. 

- 2 Timothy 4:17

I have a confession. One that I'm sure most of us have experienced while on our walk with Christ. Maybe even what brought you to Christ. I've fallen back into this trap.

I've been trying to do everything on my own.

Who hasn't tried this or believed that they could? Recently, this has been a real struggle for me. Especially with grades. I think, if I just study a little more or if I meet with the teacher one more time, then maybe I can make the grades I want. Not even the grades I need, but the ones I want. 

And what have I found? 

I can't do it all alone.

I need God by my side. I have been stressing and eating and worrying and crying and pacing and studying and venting about school and the future. Yet, I've gotten nowhere because I should be praying about it as much as I've been talking about it. That is where real strides are taken. When I pray about my burdens, I get this uncomparable peace in my heart that everything will be alright. 

Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.

- 1 Peter 5:7

Why do I not do this? I think it comes from a seed of pride and of fear. I take pride in the fact that I can balance a hectic life between school and grades and friends and a sorority and extra cirriculars. But when it all becomes too much, as it ultimately does, I don't want to admit that I can't do it. So many others can relate to this too. Whether you're a mother who wants to prove that she is "Super Mom" or a father who wants to be there for his children while also being successful at work. Whether you're a teenage girl who is dealing with issues she didn't know existed a few years ago or a guy who simply feels like he doesn't fit in. No one can do life alone. 

If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then I will hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land. 

- 2 Chronicles 7:14

The key to fixing this problem is right there. We must humble ourselves before the Lord. We have to admit that we need Him. That is a lesson that I have learned over and over again. And have continuously come to the Lord with. "God, I've done it again. I've tried to do it on my own." I know that I am a college student now, so I fully expect to face this problem again. But hopefully, the next time, I have learned to recognize it sooner. That I might turn and repent for losing faith.

When we turn to do things on our own, we are telling God that we don't believe that His plan is good enough. That we don't trust Him to lead us in the best way possible. Our hearts are not tuned in to His gentle guidance. But God's plan is always in our best interest. Romans 8:28. He always works for our good if we have been called to His service. Why do I question it? Why do we all doubt? Because faith is hard sometimes. That's the truth of it. But praying to God about any concern will always, always lighten our load.

The second major reason that I try to do it alone is because of fear. Fear of the future. Fear of the unknown. Fear of anything, honestly. The future is something that I know nothing about, its full of wishes and dreams, but, ultimately, I have no control of it. And neither do you. Honestly, that can be very scary. 

Especially, if we are not constantly in communication with God. If we are not leaning on Him and asking Him for guidance, reassurance, hope, that His will be done. My instinct tells me that if I try to control every ounce of my life, that is my best shot at controlling my future. Right now, I am in the midst of applying to medical school. So it seems like every grade, activity, or choice I make affects the outcome of acceptance. I've seen friends do wonderfully and then seen others face difficulties. And that scares me. So does the MCAT, which is what I should be studying for right now. But hey, I'm handing it over to God. 

If I do my best, He will do the rest.

If I had a life motto, that would be it. All God can ask of us is our best. He knows what that is for each of us individually. So, I will study and practice and, most importantly, pray. Because God's plan will unfold for me. Just as it will for you. 

...Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? ...Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

- Matthew 6:25-34

Don't let pride and fear have a hold in your life. Don't walk the path alone. First off, you don't want to. Second off, you don't have to. God is there by your side every step of the way. The Lord will stand by you and give you strength even when  you think you can't go on. 

In honor of Mother's Day this Sunday, I want to post one of my mama's favorite poems that I believe fits perfectly. Sometimes we don't even have to walk. Have a blessed week.

One night I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord.

Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.

In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand.

Sometimes there were two sets of footprints,

other times there were one set of footprints.

This bothered me because I noticed

that during the low periods of my life,

when I was suffering from

anguish, sorrow or defeat,

I could see only one set of footprints.

So I said to the Lord,

"You promised me Lord,

that if I followed you,

you would walk with me always.

But I have noticed that during

the most trying periods of my life

there have only been one

set of footprints in the sand.

Why, when I needed you most,

you have not been there for me?"

The Lord replied,

"The times when you have

seen only one set of footprints,

is when I carried you."

Mary Stevenson

Medicine in the Jungle

Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, "Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?" And I said, "Here am I. Send me!" - Isaiah 6:8 

I have been more than blessed to be able to go to Costa Rica over my spring break this year. This was a medical missions trip through Furman University Medical Missions Organization and International Service Learning. The idea is to go into an impoverished country and provide medical care by setting up a free clinic for the community. 

Costa Rica is located in Central America in between Nicaragua and Panama. The Caribbean is to the east and the Pacific to the west.

To give you an idea of how wonderful the people of this country are, they were voted the Happiest People in the World twice, 2009 and 2012. Everywhere we went, we were welcomed into their homes. They are one the most progressive countries in the world. 

However, these people still face health problems. Here is a brief look at some overall statistics from the World Health Organization. Lots of the problems listed were below, though not a significant problem, were very prevalent in our clinics.

http://www.who.int/gho/countries/cri.pdf?ua=1

I learned so much from this trip. I got to shadow doctors, learn how to give injections and do sututres, practice my Spanish, diagnose patients, and run the pharmacy. I went with an incredible group of college students that truly have a heart to serve and a passion for medicine. This is an experience that I wouldn't trade for anything else and is so much more than just a spring break to the beach. I always want to be intentional with my time, and I can think of no better way to do that than to love on the people of Costa Rica and to be blessed abundantly more in return. This trip reaffirmed my pursuit of a career in medicine and a life of missions.

God has played a huge role in allowing me to have this experience, and I am so thankful. I am only trying to use the gifts that he gave me to show the love of Christ to those around me. Please pray for those in  Costa Rica and who made this trip possible :)


Enjoy this brief glimpse of some the highlights of our trip, and maybe you can see a little bit of how important this place and these people are to me!

You Are Loved

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. - Psalm 139

Snow
I just love when it snows outside because, first, normally it causes the South to cancel school due to the fact that there is only one snow plow in a 50 mile area. Second, it is beautiful. When the world is quiet, reflecting the sun, and the snow remains untouched, there is a gentle tug at my heart that tells me that God is near. Only someone so great could create something so beautiful. 

This was yesterday, as the snow was just beginning to dust the ground. And, since this is South Carolina, anticipation for the snow to come was very high.

But I see God in the snow. Because He makes every snowflake different. No snowflake is exactly the same. Just like He makes us- each person unique. That's just so encouraging to me. If He puts so much time into creating each snowflake, then how much more does He invest Himself into my life. Psalm 139 is where I turn when I just need to be reminded of how much time He put into creating me, that He knows the depths of my heart. This passage just screams "You are special!" God says so.

With Valentine's Day just around the corner, I know that so many people need to hear that. Whether you have someone or you don't, it doesn't matter.

You. Are. Loved.

Go back and reread that. Say it out loud. God loves us more than we can possibly know. John 3:16-17. John 3:34.

No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord. - Romans 8:37-39

I only hope that each day, I can grasp a little more how much God loves me and that my actions will reflect that. But even more so, I want others to recognize that they, too, are important. That you are an essential part in His plan. No one goes unnoticed by Him. If he can spend time making each snowflake unique, if he knows when a sparrow falls, then how much more does he know you, how much more does he love you. 

So on Valentine's day, if you feel like you don't have someone special to share it with, remember that you are called to show God's love to anyone and everyone. Hopefully it makes it easier knowing, not only that you are loved, but that you also have a purpose for that day. Make it your mission to show love in exuberant ways. Let Him pour into you so that you have an overflow of love to give out. 

Too Cold for Comfort

The King will reply, "Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me" - Matthew 25:40 

My heart is just so full tonight that I have to write two posts. It's past midnight, so that makes it a new day right?

Homeless Ministries

With this winter vortex that just passed through Georgia and the rest of the nation, we faced record-breaking temperatures. And so did the homeless on our streets. A few years ago, the senior minister at my church, along with many others I am sure, recognized a need in our community of a place for all of those sleeping in Atlanta to have a warm shelter to brave the freezing temperatures. Yes, there are shelters downtown, but those cannot provide nearly all of the housing that is required for these precious people. So my church family stepped up and transformed our gym into a temporary shelter. 

The congregation came forward with clothing, bedding, and food donations so that we could properly care for everyone that came. We used our buses to go into the streets and pick up these people. Soon word got out among this community that Mt. Bethel would come to pick up those that needed a place to go and would return them back downtown in the morning. Over these past two days, other local churches even donated their own buses to help us gather as many people as we could.

But not only did the temperatures set records, but so did we. Over the course of Monday and Tuesday, 505 people were taken in!!! Praise the Lord!! Thank you, God, for allowing the people of the community to answer your call with their time, their talents, and their donations. Thank you for all of those that stepped into leadership positions to pull this together. And thank you for those that were behind the scenes, doing laundry in their homes so that clean bedding could be provided for the next night. 

These boys put chocolates on the pillows and prayed over every bed

This makes my heart so joyful because I truly truly feel that my church is answering God's call and is trying to serve the least of these. We also have a ministry called M25 that is based off of this verse as well and functions during the summer, bringing in other church groups and sometimes our own youth, to go downtown and other places to serve. It teaches them what it means to give selflessly. So over this past week, I have honestly seen God in the heart of my church community, and I am proud to be a part of it. 

If you are ever in the Atlanta area, please feel free to visit Mt. Bethel United Methodist Church. Our homeless ministry volunteer needs can be found here. This truly is a special place filled with the Holy Spirit, and we would love to have your prayers. 

A True Beauty

I haven't posted in a while, but I'm going to try to do better because God is everywhere. I want to seek him, hence the name of this blog, but I also want to share His love in my life with others. This post is about my mother. 

^"3 Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. ⁴ Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight." 

-1 Peter 3:3-4

This verse has been on my bathroom mirror for years because I used to struggle with strong self-image insecurities. Not that I have completely overcome them, I still have my bad hair days or day when I feel fat, but I have learned to love myself for who I am. However, whenever I used to read this verse, I would think of my mother. She embodies a "gentle and quiet spirit." That's how she has led me my entire life. Gently and quietly. 

If anyone has met me, they would tell you that I'm not quiet. I don't know about gentle, but I'm not usually quiet. Not that I'm the center of attention, but I'm a goofball; I like to sing and dance, especially while vacuuming- it's a talent; I like to laugh. So this verse used to cause me some concern. I didn't want to change who I was to be "quiet." But that was when I realized, I'm very much like my mother in these ways, and I consider her quiet. 

My mom. I'm not sure how to describe her. But I see God in her every day. Today, I was reminded of it (I'll tell that story later), but she is truly a woman of God. I honestly can't say that I've ever heard my mother say something bad about anyone. She always helps me when I ask. She's led me by teaching me what it means to be self-sacrificing, to help others, and to give of my time. She supports my life calling to be a doctor. She is so hospitable when my friends, or anyone, comes to visit, offering them food or a drink or a place to stay. So to me, my mother is the epitome of Godly beauty. She is beautiful, literally, from the inside out. And I can't thank God enough for her.

Today, we were sitting in the travel clinic meeting with a nurse about getting malaria pills for my upcoming trip to Costa Rica. She worked for days, calling to see if there were any openings or cancellations at this clinic so that I could get my perscription before I went back to school. My mother was trying so hard to make things easier on me. Apparently, I got my information wrong, and I don't need malaria medicine for Costa Rica, just insect precautions. I felt so bad. My mom spent her time and her energy to do all of this for me. She even went up there with me and sat in the waiting room. I was just reminded again what beauty looks like. And I am so grateful to have an example like her in my life. While I am at school, I call her nearly every day, even if it is only five minutes. I miss her, and sometimes, I just want her guidance or affirmation.

So today, I saw God in my mom. If she loves me this much, I can only imagine how much I am loved by Him.

Today I Saw God...

"Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door shall be opened to you." -Matthew 7:7

 Seek and you will find

Today, as I sat thinking about my life- the struggles and the joys- I realized that I miss a lot of God's works and blessings in my life simply because I'm not looking for them; I'm not seeking Him. So that's why this blog is called "Seek and You Will Find." I want to document my journey of how I find God in my everyday activities because the more attuned I become, the more thankful I can be for EVERYTHING that He does and the more that I will hear His voice. Some things may be little; some may be big- but all matter. So, that's the goal. 

Who am I?

I am a junior in college at Furman University. I'm majoring in biology and communications and hoping to use these degrees to become a doctor. (I could totally use prayers for that life calling!)  I'm in love with my family and my dog, Brody. I am pretty certain that my Patronus animal (yes, from Harry Potter) would be an otter, namely because I love the water and I think I'm fairly happy most of the time. Music has also been my life since I was 2 years old from church choir to a dancing/singing tour group to marching band. I absolutely love it even though I don't have the opportunity to perform anymore. In my spare time, I enjoy watching football (Roll Tide!), reading, crafting, and going on Pinterest.

My Spiritual Journey

I don't want to share my entire testimony just yet, but my spiritual journey started from the time I was born. I've been blessed to grow up in a Christian household that loved and cared for me. I was in church choir from preschool to the time I graduated high school. I went to youth group and Sunday school. I served on mission trips and bonded with my small group. My parents made sure that I was surrounded by the Word. 

Small group picture!

Looking back though, I think that my time in choir had the greatest impact on me. When I was younger, choir was simply an opportunity for me to do what I loved while giving back at the same time. But as I grew older, I really began to listen and believe the words that I was singing. My faith was growing. Choir also gave me the opportunity to go on "tour." This meant that our entire choir had the chance to travel across the country in order to serve for different ministries and sing at various churches. It was through these tours that I began to understand what God was calling me to do- He wants me to be a walking testimony and to share my faith. That didn't really click until then. While I feel as if I've always truly believed in Jesus with a childlike faith, I didn't always take responsibility for my faith. In high school, I feel I truly began to live out my faith, to study the Word independently, and to begin learning how to pray. In between my freshmen and sophomore year of college, I had the privilege of being able to serve as a student ministries intern for the summer at my home church. Here, I feel that I matured in my walk with God by leaps and bounds. A fire had been lit. My time in college has only helped to grow this faith through my church and my friends, and it has also taught how much I truly need to rely on God. 

So that's the short summary of how I came to be where I am and why I'm pursuing this ambition.

Where Did I See God Today?

Well, I'm glad you asked! Today, I saw God through my friends. I had a rather rough morning and really needed the power of prayer behind me, knowing that I wasn't the only one talking to God about my struggles. My friends pulled through with flying colors; everyone said a prayer for me, and they definitely helped. God answered my prayer for strength, patience, and perspective. I know that every morning I'll have to start all over again, but God is faithful. Ask and you shall receive. I'm so blessed to have such a strong support group and prayer warriors behind me. But most importantly, I'm so incredibly blessed to have a god that personally hears me, loves me, and then answers me. 

The second place I saw God today was in the sunset. I know this may be cheesy, but I have to start somewhere! This sunset, though, was amazing!! As in, people were coming out onto their balconies in the blustery wind just to capture the fluff of pink, gold, and red that brushed the clouds. Even boys were stopping to enjoy the beauty (and for me, that says something). The picture doesn't do it justice. So I'm thankful that I get to live in a world that has sunsets so beautiful I can only stare in awe of God's creation. I'm thankful for the colors that God adorns upon the skies each night. I'm thankful for the perspective that these displays of nature bring me.